Being Married

I cant seem to write about anything today, or for the past month. 

i feel like I have so much to say but I can't seem to put it into writing.

So i'm going to put things that I like about being married:

1. the companionship, feels good to have someone to love and someone loving you

2. Cooking :)

3. Having my own home/apt

4. Being able to be with the person I love

  Sometimes I feel this profound love for my husband, it feels amazing like i cannot breath. It feels good to be able to hug and cuddle with the person you love.

5. the listening, my husband listens to me like no other person it's amazing!!

anyways i should really go...

God Bless

All women cry for no reason

Sometimes like tonight I cannot fall asleep. Or I refuse to, it seems to me that no matter how much I LOVE to sleep, it's wasting time.

Sometimes like tonight, my body is so tired, eyes fighting to stay open and I still refuse to fall asleep.
What troubles me more is my husband asleep. I sometimes wish that he would stay awake with me, then I don't. If he's able to fall asleep peacefully, I thank God.

After I say my prayers, I lay on my bed and wonder about everything in my life. I doze in and out and when I'm awake I wonder why.

"All women cry for no reason"

I heard that back in middle school in a class discussion and I denied it furiously.
Sometimes I wonder if we do cry for no reason...

No. There is always a reason.

Sometimes I cry because at night there is so many things going on in my mind that I can't fall asleep.
Or,
Because I miss my family
I feel sad
I feel angry
I feel happy
Someone hurt my feelings
There is always a reason.

Do you feel like women cry for no reason? Think about it, the desperate times you feel like crying.
After I cry, small silent tears, or heart wrenching sobs, at the end there is relief, I feel like I can think better, I feel like God has given me strength. I know it may sound foolish, but that's how I feel.

At the end of the day, when I'm finally able to drift off I feel tremendously grateful.


I know I completely combined two different subjects, but it is 2:15am. I have an excuse. Good night
oh and I failed my goal... oops

Cleanliness

A few days ago a few of my friends came to visit me. It was really late at night almost 12:00 and they were passing through the city.
My sofa was piled up with laundry I had recently washed and the sink filled with dirty dishes, I had decided to leave them until the morning. It was embarrassing trying to hurriedly clean up while they waited. OUTside. Yes, in my foolishness I left them outside waiting. I was ashamed but now that its over, has that ever happened to you??
Do you clean your house constantly?
If you do, well lucky you. Unfortunately, I don't, (i am ashamed really)
I talk to other girls, and they are always talking about cleaning, not all of them cook for their husbands but they do have a clean house.
I'm not saying I live in filth but I do get lazy once in a while and leave the dishes in the sink and other little stuff.
I work part-time and that's my excuse, yet in my head I refuse to validate it and just call myself lazy.
So what I am going to do is try to keep the house clean at least without dishes in the sink!

what's that quote I'm always reading about?
Cleanliness is next to Godliness. or something like that.

On another note:
I can't believe that January is almost over, where I live the sun is already shining and you don't need a jacket to go outside. Cannot wait for February! Valentine's Day!!!

hope you have a blessed week!!

Cancer...

I just heard today about Jessica Joy Rees.
It hurts my heart that she died. I didn't know her at all. But she literary changed the world in a way that most of us will never do. May God Bless her.

It's scary.

You don't know how to protect yourself, it sneaks up on you.

You cannot protect those who you love.

Have you ever since someone die of cancer?

I have and them giving up hope is the fastest way for them to die. I had a 16 year old friend who died, i visited him almost every day, and I saw how he changed.

At the end he was not the boy i grew up with.

It's scary.

May God Protect us all